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epic!

the drama is overwhelming! jk, but this really puts off a pensive feel after kicking some ass. here are my beefs:

throughout the song, namely for the harp, violin, and brass, i think you should try modulating velocity/volume so its more dynamic. also, for the violins, instead of making the next note always start up anew, try just bending teh pitch to let them flow into each other. makes for a more continuous experience.

i dont think there's a whole lot you can do about this, but the synthetic sound of the brass kinda ruins it for me. but ill accept it lol.

idk, i just feel like this could have been more touching but just wasn't. i think my first point, and maybe strengthening even more the climax might improve it, but idk. maybe some woodwinds? glockenspiel? :D

thats all i got for ya. nice job :)

DzGuy responds:

Hey thanks for the tips man. I'll keep those in mind. Hell I'll probably start making more classical stuff now because this was kind of fun. :P

definately an interesting one.

[sorry for typoes. i ate doritos and now im typing with my index fingers lol.] liquid funk is tight lol. heres what i think:

the beat, while defianately cool, feels a little incoherent in my opinion, and i think it could be improved if you put stresses on the dominant beats with the hats, the bass drum, rides, and maybe the snares [but maybe not]. i mean, it is jazzy, so it makes sense too.

i thinkthe pad coming in at :52 is definately a keeper, and the sax is good when it comes in, with the reverb a nice touch. good job with that. i do think the bassline is good at teh start, but i thi8nk a more active touch would feel better, instead of it just alternating between two notes. either that, or some heavy distortion/modulation in there, since it seems really really stale when its going for such a long time.

like i said, the sax was good when it came in, but when we get to its solo section, it seemed a bit stale too--it sounded pretty bland tbh, even though the samples were very nice, and i think it could be improved it if you let it stray out of notes quantized to powers of 2 [32nd, 16th, 8th, whole notes, etc], and let it leak into triplets and other offbeat patterns [fits in with the challenge!! sort of], and lower, longer, distorted [natural-sounding, i dont know how to describe it. just listen to the crazy craziness sax players make in real life] notes at times so its more just like... a really soulful guy. --it seemed like the sax always wandered pretty fast and stayed really high and at a point just became unconvincing.

also try to lead into the next notes by bending pitch or having some softer, realy short notes before longer, louder ones--don't just go straight to the notes. flow into them.

sfx and mixing thruout were excellent, keep em coming.

like karco said, it seemed very repetitive. i understand that long repetitive songs are common in glitch, dnb, idm, etc, but they always have slight variations to think about in the percussion and the sonic qualities of the instruments, which people dont usually notice, but this song didnt really seem like it had those qualities to be honest. i would play with effects chains, modulation, etc throughout just to keep the listener interested.

idk if you're not done or something, but the end is realyl abrupt. just telling you :)

alright, thats what i got. hope i helped :) [i might have forgotten some stuff. i went away from keyboard for a few hrs and jst got back.]

btw, i still want a review for my track :D

mmmmm

the melodies were fine, but ill break down my constructive criticism into separate parts so that you can learn from it.

MELODY: its totally fine. but, the main problem is that it repeats too much without enough variation. you need to add in touches that break the repetition. also, it seems like the melody suits itself better as a back up instrument rather than the lead of teh song--as it is now, it seems like a stale, unfinished song, no matter how beautiful you make the pianos.

if you want, you can structure it like a conventional classical song, with the lower broken chords [as the bass clef, so to speak], supporting unit, and then add a more melodic, higher notes [the treble clef?] but right now its too empty.

CYMBALS/HATS: get rid of them. alone, they don't fit. if you're going to have percussion like that, you need more than the pianos. so you can keep them if u rework the entire thing, i think, but as of now, it just seems a little strange.

PRODUCTION: here is where i can help you a lot. the huge problem here is that you are not changing the strength of any of the notes. this piano player is an extremely rigid robot who has no emotion in his playing. what you should do are make some sections softer, some louder for emphasis. then, you should make notes that lie on the beat of the song be stronger, while those on offbeats be a little weaker, ideally. you also might consider not making them all be _exactly_ on time, because no piano player would be like that.

at the bottom of it, you want it to sound realistic in this situation, and without modulating velocity [or at least volume], it just doesnt seem to work.

finally, at the end, the choir is kind of abrupt and weird, i think it doesn't make sense unless its going throughout the song. i think it could work as a supporting instrument. but even at that level the sound you chose seems too synthetic since the whole piano vibes puts off a sort of natural happiness as the mood of the piece.

hope i helped! im not trying to be harsh, i'm just trying to give you some advice. if you want some help, jst pm me or something. if u use reason, ur in bigger luck if u want anything from me lol. i think my latest song has a good example of having a realistic piano in the background of the chorus--i can send you a stripped version of it if you want.

rock on :)

Ajgajg responds:

Thanks!
That was a really helpful response and I'll make sure to take those things into account. I did think about changing the melody a bit, so expect that in a week not much longer then that.
Take a listen to some of my other songs.

this was a good song, more or less

it was definately upbeat, but not really happy if u asked me haha it seemed kind of like a robotic monotony. I jst decided to go to the WIP thread to post my own song, and I saw ur comment, so here's my constructive crit [posted on the thread]:

http://www.newgrounds.com/bbs/topic/8 16732/4

my comments: the lead bloopy synth followed a good melody, the off-key notes every now and then were cool. i think it could be better if they had were shaped a little less--like just a straight wave, theres a quality to them that makes it seem not as unfeeling.

the drums could have been better - either a stronger bass drum or a more subdued one would have been better i think, the one u have now seems a little too... presetty? lol. for the hats, try varying the volume, like makign it go from soft to loud on each triplet to make it more dynamic, and the snare sample is just lame--i'd find a completely different sound for it, or just remove it alltogether if it still sounds good.

the backup lead was cliched NG style, but it fit the style of teh song well enough i guess. i think a deep pad would have worked a lot better, but thats jst my opinion. the bassline would have also been better if u can make it lower and deeper. you can try keeping the original sound by layering it with a low sine wave instead of just a sawtooth--i wanna feel my woofers shake more :)

i guess thats all my constructive crit for now, hope i helped!

SupraDarky responds:

Great review, one of the best I've received yet! Sorry about the late response, I've been away for 10 days and just came back. Very good crit, I will try to fix everything you said and make it sound better. I'll PM you when it's done and thank you. :) Sorry about the short response after such a big review, I'm actually super tired right now! ;P I'll start working on it tomorrow.

epic phail.

how about, you click the legal code button on the song, and notice that you aren't allowed to post ANYTHING by ANYONE that you haven't made. thanks for defeating the point of the entire portal--speeding a song up is illegal and irrelevant since this is a place for making music.

well made

i think you're doing a good job with these... but please... honestly, find a new lead synth, its starting to wear on me that half of your songs sound the same lol. i mean, the only real variation was melody and that the bounce one was in 3/4 time, but that's so insignificant already. i jst wanna hear something new, though that's kinda difficult here since newgounds idolizes this kind of stuff. w/evs... :P

Envy responds:

The b0unc3 song is 4/3 not 3/4... And for previews like this I use the same synth anyways because I usually don't plan on continuing with them, so I just throw the easiest one on.

yay!

nice :) this was a nice little loop to jst listen to and chill. though, the continuity of the song died when you removed the pad at the end, so the loop sounds a bit forced, and the offbeat drum loopage shouldn't loop so often--the offbeat snare is somethign that kind of throws u off, and i dont want it to keep happening every 4 bars haha.

i personally thin ka more mellow drum beat may have worked better, but this is good too heh. though if u modulated the bass drum a little bit, that may have been cool too.

yeah, those are my random suggestions. but at the end of the day, nice loop :D

and in turn, do as you say, and be fair, and check my stuf out: D [i skipped the first 2 since they really aren't original serious songs, you know? but hte zero bomb one, you went way too complicated! no noob would cut up a loop and rearrange it, and in some ways, the way u did that was pretty legit, TBH. slicing is an art...]

yummy

this had some really good elements and was definately immersive, but some flaws kept it from having staying power in my mind. ill just say things as i hear them, and then give you an overall analysis later.

--

INTRO - those starting snares are just kind of lame and annoying, i'd say sack them and go for a more pad-driven start, or find better samples TBH.

PERCUSSION - i didn't really like the bass drum-->snare every beat combo you had on, it didn't seem to quite jive well with the pads. i think a more breakbeat-ey sound, or possibly nothing at all, would go well. the cymbals every now and then also sometimes seemed out of place. When the drums went away except for a few soft snares, that was good, but make it more noticable - they got kind of lost and overwhelmed. but they did give an interesting even military-ish feel

PADS/SYNTHS - very nice! i really liked the atmosphere they set just by the nature of their sound. what i would do, though, is change their ASDR envelopes so that some fade in and out instead of just coming on abruptly... it sounds better that way. otherwise, they're pretty good.

OUTRO - it just... ended! all of a sudden, you killed the vibes, so i think you could have improved in that aspect... even a simple fade away would be appropriate here.

OVERALL COMPOSITION - the melodies themselves sounded good, but they are a bit randomly placed and come in and out without smooth transitions. try to make your song have more logical steps steps to follow like a story--some times it wasn't very smooth, IMO.

--

so, this was a pretty good song in my opinion by the nature of the synths that you chose and the melodies you made. they were very warm and fuzzy, and the subtle, silent SFX throughout really gave the track personality and interest. but, technical details, your choice of how the song progressed, and organizational defects makes it a bit weak in some aspects. overall, its a really nice song :) gj.

btw, thx for checkin out my song :D and ur name is legit awesome lol.

wow!

this is pretty damn awesome, it just sounds badass. love the bassline and beat, especially how you tweaked it into insanity a few times, and the vox definately fit.

here are some suggestions for [possible] improvement:

MIX: try to bring the bass drum forward a bit in the mix and raise its higher frequencies, and bring the bass a little bit down [yeah, i know its cool with the sidechaining and stuff, but its a bit too overpowering ;)] yeah, the brass sample gets lost a little bit there. and the vox get lost a little bit throughout and are totally obscured in sections like :31 - :45, which isn't a good thing [though the oscillation there is very nice]. try bringing up the levels a bit, and maybe subtly compressing/sidechaining the whole track along the vox & bass drum. i think that might work. in fact, i should try that lol

INTRO/OUTRO - they are a bit abrupt--they sound more like they're in a mix cd lol. are they? hehehe

VOX: apart from the mix, some sections could be incorporated better with the music - for example, when the dude says "WHAT THE FUCK?!?!" and when the women come in, i want the music to react too :)

FLOW OF THE SONG: overall, sections flowed into each other incoherently. it feels almost too wandering and unorganized, but thats just a matter of personal preference

:D hope i helped out, and nice track overall. u get a 5 and a download ^^ and thanx for checking out my song, ill try to finish that hehe [maaan its so weird, in teh course of like 2 days the score went up by like .7 and ~15 votes and 4 reviews were added after it stagnated for a week haha this is awesome]

Auecs responds:

Hey thanks for a good review. I am, However, the more i listen to this song, not fond of it. It was more of a sketch of what I could potentially do as a remix. I probably spen about 4 hours on it when i need to spend about three times as long perfecting it. The first flaw it has is a crappy acapella I downloaded. It was incomplete and sounded like shit. So thats the first thing I would do is find a quality vocal track. Also, Compositional elements need work like you said and also I need to compress more and all that crap.

Haha. I know its a mess and incomplete... I think it rocks and I am proud of my work but at the same time very critical on myself.

Somday I might pick this project up again. I have too many other things going on for me to do anything about it right now...

Thanks again for your feedback!!!

-Auecs

nice!

thanks for checking out my song :)

btw, this isn't house, but that's irrelevant to the song. yeah, there isnt any category on NG like breakbeats that would fit, so whatevs.

haha i remember hearing this song on the trailer for sunshine a while back, such a ridiculously dramatic song lulzzzzz.

onto the reviewwww!
==
I thought that this was overall very solid. the beat is strong, the strings are set a definately pensive yet scary and anticipatory mood, and the glitchy drumwork throughout was clean, sweet, and a great ambient choice. and nice pumping bassline! that's definately a plus. here are some suggestions for improvement:

OVERALL STRUCTURE
the song stayed a bit constant throughout. i think that it could have used some more variation to spice it up--from the beginning to the end, the it seemed like the tone stayed more or less constant, the melodies the same, except for the lead melody synth changing from chimes and cellos to the dramatic strings.

while i see that you might have been going for a more subtler, pensive feel, i really thought that the repeated notes on the strings called for escalation and intensity.

a possible way to do this--ramp up in intensity as the song goes on in ways apart from adding instruments. try distorting the thick bassline and letting it rise a bit, or edit the strings samples and chord them up [yeah... that takes work to retain the sound of the strings, but i think it'd be worth it]. make the drum arrangement itself grow intense, and if you feel particularly melodramatic, maybe throw in some tempo changes. idk, these are jst a bunch of random suggestions, but i felt like there should have been a ramp up in intensity and a change in mood.
--
DRUMS/BEAT
i think you were really good on this end, though i have some suggestions. the snare every other beat got lost in the mix, its way too soft and unimposing. i think that a tight snare with some compression would sound good--because otherwise the beat seems a little unbalanced and a little less interesting than it could be.

i liked the hat rolls. those were great, but what i'd do is shorten the attack on the hats [compressor again yay!!] and their length when they roll like that because it seems muddled like a long string of shakers or something. that, or use an alternate closed hat sample. if they were more defined individual hats it would sound better, IMO.

I liked how something was playing every 16th note, pretty much, giving it a nervous and anticipatory feel. what i would do, though, is change the style of glitching as it goes through--i wish i heard some different SFX, some different kinds of glitching. try listening to some good IDM songs to get a feel of what i mean--it constantly changes, and it makes it all the more interesting.

MIX

bring up the strings a bit more at the pensive moments of the song, when the violins play lower, and the cellos and basses come into play, and bring up the chimes/synthier elements when teh strings are dramatic--they play a game where sometimes one's lost in the mix, and sometime the other is.

the bassline, maybe try boosting higher frequencies on it. that might sound interesting/crispier/texture-ier.

same goes for the bass drum, IMO, or try layering it to give it some texture

and that is all!

== /constructive crit

so, overall, gj! you really set the mood, but with some tweaking, this could be even awesomer. woooo

arandomdj responds:

Many thanx for the in-depth review, appreciate the good feedback. I myself think too there should be more genres listed here on Newgrounds, i put this on House since i felt like this particular breakbeat genre fits in the progressive-house breaks. This song had to be trimmed down to fit on a particular scene of the short movie it was intended, so that's why i had to leave some parts out of this final version ( i agree it needs a tension builder). I still have a lot to learn when it comes to the mastering and final mix. It's something i'm still understanding, discovering and learning from helpful people like you :) , i`ve always focused more on the creative part than on the tech side of my projects, but now that i'm getting better at it i realize both parts should be important.
You have great ideas, you know!, i was thinking on adding a lil bit more of cutoff on the sidechained bass or any other synths, as well as some other longer FX to achieve the tension building and come up with a more dramatic break down that way. I did have to listen to some IDM tracks and some trip hop tunes, just to get on the mood, since i generally do more punchy stuff, those gave me the idea for building my drumset, i tried a lot of snares but listening to some downtempo i thought the rimshots suited the breaks, but as you say, on the final mix this were kinda lost. I don't know what else to say except that you're an excellent reviewer. Thanks again, you make me try harder

started 4 yrs ago, and kickin. check it out! Myspace: http://www.myspace.c om/p4caudio

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